Introduction Bigfoot. Probably the most talented animal of all time. Why? Because bigfoot lives an amazing life and still, to this day, has yet to be seen (allegedly). Because he hasn’t been seen, no one has a clue as to what he looks like, how he acts, and what he does. Fortunately for everyone reading this, I am a bigfoot expert. Take a second to read this blog on the greatest creature of all time. His appearance Bigfoot is simply put, a beast. The average bigfoot stands anywhere from 7 to 9 feet weighing around 300-500 pounds. All bigfoots are absolutely jacked because of their lifestyle. Bigfoots can slightly vary in color, but most tend to fall into a brown color scheme. Although, it is important to note that their hair becomes white in the winter months. Every bigfoot may be slightly different but all of them are almost identical. I am not sure what that means but figure it out. Where he lives Bigfoot is a fan of nature. He loves to be where the trees and water are. Hence why when searching for bigfoot, people look in the forest. What people don’t understand is that Bigfoot is one of the smartest creatures alive. In certain instances, bigfoot is smarter than your average human. Why does this matter? Bigfoot is so smart that he has brainwashed an entire population into looking in the woods, when in reality, he lives in a house. That is right, bigfoots live in homes across the world. They aren’t seen because they don’t come out of their houses. Daily life The ultra-athletic, hard-working, down to earth, charming Sasquatch. He typically starts his day by lifting weights. Around lunch, he lifts some more weights. What does he do after that? He gets absolutely jacked. All bigfoot does is lift weights so that he can be at peak physical performance. After all, the bigfoot was placed on this earth to serve as protectors once the apocalypse occurs. They know their job, they know why they are here, and they are dedicated to serve, even though they are disrespected by people who do not believe. P.S. They get absolutely wasted. Conclusion You will probably never see bigfoot. You will probably never hear bigfoot. You will probably never believe in bigfoot. With that being said, bigfoot sees you. Bigfoot hears you. Bigfoot believes in you.
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Ryan TeamanJust a young adult from the Eastern Shore of Maryland. I typically have a lot of crazy ass ideas, so this is where I will let them lay. Enjoy. |